By Gary Worthington, More Than Monkeys

Let’s be honest. A lot of people become engineering managers because they were good engineers. Then somewhere along the way, they get stuck in meetings, start obsessing over burndown charts, and forget what it’s like to actually build something.

The job changes. And if you’re not careful, you change with it – in all the wrong ways.

But being an effective software engineering manager isn’t about giving up engineering. It’s about building the environment where great engineering happens. That means less spreadsheet, more stewardship. Less micromanaging, more multiplying.

So if you’ve just stepped into the role or you’ve been at it for a while and want to level up, here are the principles I’ve seen work over and over again. Startups, scale-ups, enterprise – it doesn’t matter.

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1. Know What Your Team Is Actually Here to Do

Sounds obvious, but most teams don’t have a clear, shared understanding of why they exist.

Your job is to define and reinforce that purpose. What problems is the team solving? Who are they solving them for? What does success look like?

When you get this right, decision-making gets easier. Engineers know where to focus. Product knows what to ask for. Stakeholders stop asking for random features. And you, as a manager, stop acting like a traffic cop and start acting like a compass.

2. Deliver Software. That’s the Job.

There’s a weird trend where managers spend so much time on “people stuff” and “strategy” that they forget their team is supposed to ship software.

Don’t be that person.

Great managers care about delivery. They set goals, remove blockers, and drive decisions that move the product forward. That doesn’t mean setting arbitrary deadlines or cracking the whip. It means creating an environment where engineers can do their best work and holding the line when things drift.

Good intentions are great. But working software in production is what pays the bills.

3. You’re Not a Project Manager. But You Need to Know What’s Going On.

No one’s asking you to update Gantt charts or write weekly reports. But if you don’t know what the team is working on, what’s blocked, or when something’s shipping – you’re not managing, you’re observing.

Your job is to maintain situational awareness.

Check in regularly. Ask questions. Know enough about the tech to understand trade-offs. Then use that insight to make better decisions, spot risks early, and stop surprises before they escalate.

4. Give Feedback That Actually Helps

Engineers don’t need vague platitudes like “good job” or passive-aggressive comments in a 1:1. They need clear, timely, actionable feedback.

Tell people when they’re doing well. Be specific about what made it good. Tell them when something’s off. Be kind, but direct. Don’t wait for performance review season – treat feedback like pair programming. Frequent, honest, and two-way.

Your best people want to get better. Make sure they’re not left guessing how.

5. Build a Grown-Up Team

A mature team doesn’t need handholding. They need clarity, autonomy, and support. That’s your job.

Create shared ownership. Encourage people to make decisions. Expect high standards, and give people the trust to meet them. And when someone screws up? Treat it as a learning opportunity, not a blame game.

The more you treat people like adults, the more they’ll act like it.

6. Be Available. Not Always Present.

It’s tempting to be everywhere – every standup, every planning session, every tech huddle. But if you’re always in the room, your team becomes dependent on you and your senior engineers don’t grow.

Step back. Let the team lead.

But don’t disappear either. Check in. Be visible. Make time for people. The goal isn’t to be omnipresent. It’s to be available when it matters.

7. Shield Strategically. Don’t Smother.

One of the biggest clichés in engineering management is the idea of “shielding the team.” And yes – sometimes you need to absorb chaos so the team can stay focused.

But shielding becomes smothering if your team never hears customer feedback, never deals with stakeholders, and never sees the real-world impact of their work.

Be a buffer when needed. But involve your team in the messy stuff. They’ll learn faster. And you’ll stop being the single point of failure in every conversation.

8. Don’t Confuse Busyness With Progress

It’s easy to fall into the trap of measuring productivity by how “busy” the team feels. Lots of tickets. Lots of meetings. Lots of context-switching.

But being busy isn’t the same as being effective.

Ask yourself:

• Are we solving the right problems?

• Is the work aligned to outcomes?

• Are we learning as we go?

If the team is shipping fast but learning nothing, you’re building a delivery machine – not a product team. Great managers balance execution with reflection.

9. Create Growth Without Promising Promotions

Not everyone can be promoted every year. That doesn’t mean you can’t create opportunities to grow.

• Give people messy, ambiguous problems to untangle

• Let engineers mentor others, lead initiatives, shape direction

• Offer feedback that pushes people out of autopilot

Career progression isn’t just titles and ladders. It’s about building confidence, skill, and impact over time.

10. Hold the Line on What Matters

You will be asked to cut corners. To rush things. To deprioritise quality. To please someone senior by delivering something half-baked.

Don’t.

Be the person who holds the line.

• On engineering standards

• On sensible trade-offs

• On treating people well

• On balancing speed with sustainability

The best managers don’t just get results. They do it without compromising what makes great software teams great.

Engineering management isn’t glamorous. It’s not about being the smartest person in the room or delivering epic TED talks to the team. It’s about being relentlessly useful.

Your job is to:

• Keep things moving

• Make your team better

• Grow people

• Align work to outcomes

• And never forget that this is all about shipping great software

If you can do that consistently and calmly, with a bit of humour, you’re already doing better than most.

Want more like this?

You can read more of my writing at More Than Monkeys or follow me on LinkedIn where I regularly share practical takes on product, people, and engineering leadership.